How Full is Your Basket

Ashes Sitoula @awesome

How full is your basket? Recently I was having one of my low moments and I realized that all the things I was concerned about does not identify who I am.  Therefore, I decided to put my thoughts in a mental basket and allow myself to see that what’s in the basket does not define who I am, but it’s a part of who I am.  We need to stop making hasty decisions based on one feeling, one incident, or one wrong turn.  A lot of what we are experiencing is caused by our anxiety, our failures, our hopes and dreams, or our past mistakes.  It’s okay to allow those feelings to go through your body as long as you don’t stay in that place.

With the excitement and the pressure that the New Year brings most of us feel that this is a great time to start new projects.  But not necessarily!  Don’t get caught up in the New Year, New You phenomenon. For most people this should be a time of reflection on what worked, what did not work, and the changes we need to make moving forward.  When you look at your basket you need to be able to see it as something outside of you and not see it as you.  When I gathered my thoughts and concerns and put them in my basket, I must say that my basket was full.  However the great thing about that was, I was able to separate the basket from me.  I could look at it when I needed to or felt like looking at it.  I could also leave it sitting there altogether.  I could add items as they came to mind, and that in itself removed the thought or concern from the immediate forefront of my mind.  It’s almost like writing down what needs to get done.  Once you release it on paper you are no longer bound by your thoughts.  So, is your basket full?  If it is then that’s a good thing. It simply means that you have transferred your thoughts to a place outside yourself where you can deal with them at your leisure.

Disappointment is Caused by Unmet Expectations

Tom Pumford @tompumford

Disappointment is caused by unmet expectations.  It is normal to expect things in life. If you sit in a chair, you expect that chair to hold you.  If you work all week then you expect a paycheck on Friday, or whatever day your payday falls.  There is nothing wrong with having expectations.  When you create a vision board don’t you expect those visions to become reality?  Why else would you do the board?  Why waste your time and energy on something that you don’t expect to happen?  A disappointment starts when there is an appointment.  There are four elements to an appointment:  1)people, 2)place, 3) purpose, and 4)time.  So all of these elements play a vital part in why and how we become disappointed.  First, people will let you down.  Second, this may not be the right place for what you anticipate to happen.  Third, you may have the wrong motives for this particular endeavor.  And lastly, it just might not be the right time!  So think about these elements as you put your plans into motion.

The other side of the coin is when we place unrealistic expectations on ourselves and on others. This automatically sets us up for disappointment.  Unrealistic can mean that, there is no way that it can be done, or it could mean, that based on previous experiences you know that it’s NOT going to happen.  Not to say that people and circumstances can’t surprise you, however, then it becomes a pleasant response to your expectations rather than a disappointment.  You cannot be disappointed about something that you didn’t expect to happen.  That’s just common sense.